His Want
by Meimi
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with Namco or anyone who hold rights to Tales of the Abyss. It isn't mine, I'm just playing with it.
Spoiler Warning: Uh, mid-game I guess.
He'd never considered himself to be much of a narcissist before now. To be fair, he'd always known that he was good-looking. It had been impossible to escape that particular realization when he'd grown up in a manor surrounded by servants who went out of their way at times to compliment him on his looks. Of course, he now knew why they had complimented him more on his looks than anything else. There hadn't been much else to compliment their lord's son on. He hadn't been exceptional in the brains department -far from it-, and he had definitely been the epitome of a spoiled brat. He had been, and was still such an idiot. Master Van hadn't even had to work hard at it to wrap him around his little finger. He'd lapped up the attention like a starving puppy, and damn the rest.
Not that Van was much of a consideration at the moment. This wasn't Van. And if deliriously thinking that Asch was stunningly beautiful when he reared up like that, tossing his hair back behind him just so, was narcissism, then he truly was a hopeless narcissist. Because Asch was nothing if not ungodly beautiful in this singular moment, and that wasn't even taking what he was doing into account. Oh no, what he was doing to Luke was the entire point, but he could still admire the view, even if his eyes would rather roll back in his head from the maddening sensations coursing throughout his body.
Asch was not gentle. His kisses weren't meant to coax. They were meant to claim. They were hot and wet and demanding. They weren't thoughtfully gauged to entice him. They were searing in their intensity, meant to drive the arousal out of him if absolutely necessary. Not that they were really necessary in that regard. Just watching Asch could make him painfully hard if he let it. Who in their right mind could look as someone so unbelievably beautiful without wanting him? Well, okay, maybe Guy could, but Guy had issues. And issues were something that he really didn't want to deal with right now, which is why he had decided to try his luck out on what seemed to be a thoroughly hopeless cause. Imagine his surprise when it had turned out to be anything but.
Asch was rough and hard and so very far from gentle. Not that Luke would ever complain, Asch made it hurt in all the right places and it felt so fucking amazing. They hadn't spent much time in preparation, so it had certainly been painful when Asch had abruptly pushed into him, and it still ached with each and every single pounding thrust. Hell, every now and then he could feel the ache of it all the way up in his molars. But it felt so damned good. And as Asch leaned back down, his teeth grazing against his replica's skin, all that Luke could manage to do was hold on for dear life and enjoy the most satisfying ride he'd ever received, much less participated in.
This was what he had really wanted, what he secretly craved. He didn't want to be needed, not as a failed tool or as a -pathetic- friend in need of misplaced sympathy. He didn't want people trying to cheer him up because they needed him to be more himself. He didn't want to be needed at all. No, it wasn't that. Not in the least. He had sought out something -anything- from Asch because he knew that he didn't need him. He didn't need Luke at all, not for anything. Hell, he'd probably be better off without him. No, for something like this, it would be because Asch wanted it. He didn't want Luke for a friend or to be some stupid, misguided doll in his lunatic schemes of fixing the world thanks to its own insanities. He just wanted Luke. That was all that Luke wanted, to be wanted for nothing else but himself. Not because he was a friend in need of support, and certainly not because he was stupid enough to be used in the most obvious ways possible. No. In one single moment, he just wanted to be wanted for existing in the right place at the right time, wanted for just being Luke.
That was more than enough for him. Everything else was just a delicious bonus.