Heaven's Wish
Memory 01 - Within My Reach
by Midori Kou

 

My dreams are nothing but darkness...
I see nothing... I am alone...
Is this what I want?
Is this what I wish for?
What is my future in this pitch, black void...?
I don't know... I don't know...
Please God, tell me...
Is there someone to guide me to the light...?
An angel who will be there besides me forever?

Ken Ichijouji tapped his pencil on his desktop as the lead chipped off with every percussionist rhythm. A deep groove appeared on the wooden work area by his stressful grip. His amethyst eyes shimmered by the sunlight entering his room as they gazed at the damage tabletop. Delicately, his fingers caressed the rough texture of the tampered table, feeling the uneven levels of the wood. Dry... sharp... unbalance... He somewhat fascinated by it in a strange way.

The short hair boy sighed as his eyes shifted their attention to the outside world. The warm colors of the sky devoured the depressing mood that was clinching onto his heart. It was lively and beautiful, but instead of absorbing the sweetness of life, here he was, enclosed by the four walls of his room. Locked in by responsibility and earning success, the Bearer of Kindness hated his refine life. Sure he was well-known, smart and able to do anything in the world, but to maintain that reputation was impossible.

From the very moment the Dark Seed lost its power over him, he was no longer a prodigy child but an ordinary boy, trying to live up to the expectations of the world. That person was no longer him and yet people still believe so. Was this the curse of the Dark Seed? Despite the fact he was able to overcome the darkness, it still exists in his life...In his sorrow and struggles.

Ken clinched his teeth furiously as the pencil snapped in half in his hands. Gasping in surprised, the short hair boy dropped the fractured pieces onto the tabletop and dragged to his chair away from his desk. He raised his hand that gripped the writing utensil and stared at it aimlessly. His hand was shaking, unable to maintain its calm. Slouching over, his violet starlit eyes observed the warm daylight sky turning into dusk. Sighing, he leaned his head back to stare at the ceiling as his hand reached to grasp the air. Nothing... Nothing is within my reach...

A knock woke him from his puzzling thoughts as his mother carefully entered his room, hoping she did not interrupt his studies. Kindly in a gentle tone, she asked motherly, "Ken-kun, it's time to eat, dear..."

The Bearer of Kindness eyed her and forcefully smiled back in response. "I'll be right there, Oka-san."

Worried, she lowered her gaze and slipped out of his bedroom without saying another word. Mr. Ichijouji caught her leaving their son's room, questioning her mood. "Sayako... Is something the matter?" he inquired with a comforting voice. The light skin woman shook her head and headed to the kitchen silently. Her male counterpart was reluctant to leave it at that and she knew perfectly what he was intending to do - continue to ask until she would talk to him.

Taking in a deep breath, Mrs. Ichijouji replied, "There's nothing wrong at all, Katsuya..."

"But you look a bit worried."

"I'm worried about Ken..."

Mr. Ichijouji raised his eyebrow and analyzed her face. She appeared drained and upset, but what could allow her to feel that way? "What about him?" he asked cautiously.

"He hadn't been out for a while. It had me worried for quite some time."

"Now, that you had mentioned it, I hadn't seen him hanging out with his friends for this entire week. He had been cooped up in his room, focusing on his studies 24/7."

"Takeru-kun called earlier, wondering what was wrong with him on behalf of all his friends... If he was sick or if anything worse... He even stopped by today, wanting to check on him... As much as I encourage studying, he had been neglecting his social life."

"Maybe we should have a talk with him?"

Mrs. Ichijouji shook her head, rejecting his proposed idea. "I don't think that'll be enough though. Even if we tell him, he may just feel the same way... I wonder why he's forcing himself to still be the ideal genius..."

****

Takeru walked down the sidewalk with his hands dug into his pockets. Last night's sleep was restless. He could not stop worrying about... About practically everything. The flood of thoughts filling his mind enveloped his quiet night...Alone... His mother was out, working late and hadn't came back until this morning. She was managing for the both of them and he hated being such a burden to her. He wished that he could do something about it, but he just didn't have the ability to do so.

He was weak. He knew that, but everybody thought of him as the most capable person who could do anything if he put his mind to it. The truth is he can't do everything, even if he wanted to. He was confined in a child's body, wanting to break out into the world of adulthood. Dreaming and wanting were two different things and he was far beyond from what he desires. If only you could... If only you could... His consciousness reminded him as continued walking in the direction of Odaiba Junior High.

"Takeru-kun!" a high-pitch voice cried out behind him. Casually, the blond teen turned around, searching for who had called his name. Approaching him was a girl with long chestnut hair with strands of braids tied with pink ribbons. She waved to him and he grinned in return. "Ohaiyo, Takeru-kun," she said as she joined him.

"Hikari-chan, you seem awfully happy and energetic today," he replied as he smiled.

"Yep, absolutely!" she cheered. "And do you know why?" She elbowed him on his side softly as a kind gesture. Takeru rolled his eyes and looked to the side. His face became flushed with red as he cleared his throat.

"It's my birthday..."

Nodding her head, she viewed the golden haired boy face to face. "Which means there's going to be a surprise," she giggled.

"A surprise?" Takeru asked out of confusion. "But you never gave me a 'surprise' birthday. I always asked you what I wanted and you got it."

"But today's special!" Hikari exclaimed. "You're sixteen now!"

"So are you...," he uttered in a dragged out tone.

"Yeah, but by next spring, we'll be in high school...," the chestnut hair girl mumbled.

"Yeah, next spring..."

"Takeru-kun?" The Child of Light asked with concern. "Is something wrong?"

The blond teenage boy shrugged her question off his mind and walked away from her silently. Leaving her to trail behind him, he hurried as much as his feet would allow him to, distancing himself from the chestnut hair girl. He didn't want to deal with questions for others. What he felt was none of anybody's concern but his own. Nobody had ever wondered how he was as often as everyone else. As far as he knew, he was the last person on the list to be cared about. As class president, no one ever thought he could suffer or bear any problems.

But he was human like them and yet his fellow classmates believed he was superior. His status was a lie. He was not as strong as people would expect him to be. Sure, he can beat anyone at basketball or score the highest grade on the exam, but appearing this way was much different. As much as he loved to play basketball, he never wanted to become team captain. As much as he loved to learn, he never dreamt of becoming an overachiever. People wanted him to and he did so to make others accept him... For others to accept Takeru Takaishi who bears a phantom glass mask.

His character was fragile but very elusive. No one knew what he was capable of, let alone understood his emotions. The two-sided demon possessed The Child of Hope all his life and yet no one could see the merciless beast covering his eyes and choking his air to breathe. They allowed the blond teenager to suffer. All they could do was to stare and eye him as his freedom died by the hands of the demon.

To be confined by expectations... To be looked upon as a role model... He did not want any of it. He wanted to escape his barred cage and fly freely as God intended him to. If only the people would let him...

"Takeru-kun! Takeru-kun~!!" Hikari chased him and blocked his path. With her arms extended out, her copper red eyes stared at him angrily. Takeru tried to not pay any attention to the chestnut haired girl, but she was as stubborn as he was. Sighing tirelessly, he shot a stern look at her.

"Please get out of my way, Hikari-chan. We'll be late if you continue this," he uttered.

"Forget it, Takeru! I won't let you off the hook until you tell me what's going on?"

"There's nothing bothering me... Now can we please go?"

"You're lying!"

"Look I don't have time for this."

"Then just tell me! Just tell me what the heck is going on? You seemed bothered and I want to know how I can help!"

"Well, you can't, all right! You can't help me. No one can... J-Just leave me alone... Just leave me alone, Hikari-chan... Please... I want to be alone..."

"Takeru-kun..." Her eyes were in enormous shock by his response. Never in a million years would she hear the golden haired boy asked to be left alone. Even when he felt depressed, Takeru would ask for some company to soothe his pain. But why... Why are you refusing my help now, Takeru? What's different?

Coldly, The Child of Hope turned away from the chestnut hair girl and continued to head towards school, alone... I don't want anybody's help. I just need some space to figure things out, Hikari-chan. Please understand that...

****

The Bearer of Kindness entered his homeroom, tired and drained. It was finally the last class of the day and all he needs to do is rest his mind. Sure, it was a free study period, but why in the world would he study when that is all he do at home. With his entrance exams hanging in the balance, Ken really had hoped to spend time with his closest friends. But with his grades dropping immensely, this was no time to flake off.

Setting his bag onto the side of this desk, he pulled out his notebook out of the leather slip and opened to the middle of its pages. There lying in between was a light green envelope with a metallic silver star sticker on the flap. Gently he picked it up and observed it. It still was sealed and hadn't been opened. On the front, it had his name written in silver gel ink.

As he carefully opened the envelope, Ken pulled out a small card bound with a golden ribbon. Slipping the ribbon off, he read the card.

Ichijouji-kun,
You are cordially invited to Takeru's 16th birthday party, also known as Operation Surprise Special. The party is to begin at 6:00 PM, after Takeru's tournament game. It'll be held at Yamato-san's apartment and all you need to do is bring yourself. If you want to get Takeru, make sure it's nothing sporty. We kinda over did the whole sport theme for the last few years so try to get something more meaningful than another basketball, sweatbands, or hats. I think Takeru has a lot of those now because of us. ^^; So try to make it if you can. If not, just give us a little buzz during the party to wish Takeru a happy birthday. Hope to see you there! ^_^

Your friendly party coordinator,
Hikari Yagami

The short hair boy's lips parted as he read the note in the card. Sighing, he placed the card into his breast pocket and laid his head onto his desk. As he stared at the passing clouds through the window, he slowly closed his eyes and allowed his thoughts to absorb his mind. Takeru's birthday would be today, if I'm not mistaken. I've been so out of the loop lately... I wonder if they really want me there. I hadn't been much of a friend lately...But my mother did say they were worried about me...Maybe I should go before it's entrance exam fever. It'll be nice to talk to someone about my problems while I'm there...

****

The Bearer of Hope gulped down an entire can of Pokari Sweat after the game as he threw his towel over his shoulder. His teammates cheered for their victory and praised him for another win in the junior high basketball tournament. He gently smiled in response and turned away, packing his belongings into his gym bag. Suddenly someone slapped his back, sending his head slamming into the locker.

Furious, he rubbed his fingers over his temple and quickly turned around to see who had offended him. There, standing before him was Daisuke Motomiya in his soccer jersey, covered with grass stains and dirt. With a friendly grin, he boasted, "Another win for Odaiba Junior High's soccer team!"

"And another win for Odaiba's basketball team...," the blond grumbled. As much as Takeru loved the taste of victory, he was annoyed by Daisuke's tremendous ego. For his sanity, the golden hair boy had to play along.

"So that still leaves us in second place in the Japan Junior Tournaments if Kaishou wins today as well..."

"Yeah..." As Takeru changed out of his basketball jersey, Daisuke headed to his locker to grab his clothes, following the blond's lead.

"So Takaishi..."

"Hmm?"

"Got any plans today?"

"Well, I'm supposed to head to my brother's apartment today since my mother is holding a private interview at our home."

"I'm guessing that'll make our group study delayed then."

"Pretty much," he answered as he slipped on his windbreaker jacket over his white shirt. "Well, I'm heading out. Ja ne..."

As Takeru exited the boys' locker room, Daisuke pulled out his cell phone from his pile of clothes and flipped it open. Placing the phone against his ear, the spiked hair boy speed dialed by a press of a button. "Hey, Hikari-chan! Boy Wonder has left the building and is heading your way as planned."

"Good. Initiate plan number 2 and quickly get yourself ready, Daisuke-kun! I doubt Yamato-san would be happy to see clumps of dirt all over the apartment."

"Yes, ma'am! Will do! Motomiya Daisuke, over and out!" Shutting off his cell phone, the spiked hair boy rapidly stripped his jersey off and changed into his school uniform. Rustling through his belongings, he quickly dashed out of the locker room and proceeded with his next mission of Operation Surprise Special.

****

As Takeru walked down the route to his father and brother's apartment, the blond observed the sights around him. The people... The stores... They were ever so alive than ever. With the winter season approaching, business has been booming. Everybody was moving and working, including his mother. She had been so careful around him lately, but he didn't know why. It was not because of his birthday, definitely not. It was something he could place his finger on. If only he knew...

Strolling pass his former school, Odaiba Elementary, Takeru faced the opposite end of the street where the ocean lie. The waves rolled in a rhythm, washing in and eroding the sand. But that alone did not mesmerize him to draw his attention away from heading home. There standing on the other end of the street was a teenage boy about his age in a black private school uniform. He was staring towards the direction of the ocean. Apparently, the boy did not feel his presence until a speeding car rushed pass them.

Slowly, the boy turned around as his shoulder-length hair swayed freely in the air. Takeru's lips parted as he uttered his name under his breath. "Ichijouji-kun..."

"Yeah... It's me..."

"It's been a while...," The blond remarked as he crossed the street to join him.

"I've been busy with my studies," Ken replied.

"So what brings you out here?"

"Nothing... Just needed to calm myself..."

"Stressed?"

You're listening to me?

"A bit..."

"Is it because of your studies?"

Do you understand me...What I'm going through?

"Yeah, because of entrance exams and such."

"It seems to be the same uneasy feeling all of us are having lately," the blond said as he viewed the beauty of the sky.

"Do you feel stressed?"

Yeah, because of everyone's damn expectations!

"No... After a while, you get use to it," he lied.

"I see..."

"So are you planning to stay here any longer?"

Please talk to me more...I need someone to tell my problems to!

"Yeah, pretty much..."

"Well, plan not to stay here long or you'll catch a cold."

Please stay here! Stay here to hear me and comfort me! Tell me what should I do?!

"You're leaving?"

"Yeah, have to be at my brother's apartment before he beats the crap out of me."

"Better not keep him waiting."

"Yeah... Well, I guess I'll see you later then."

Don't leave me...

"Yeah, later then..."

As the blond was about to depart from the short hair boy, Ken quickly grasped his body close to his and buried his face upon his back. Takeru's eyes widen in response as he felt the sudden warmth of the other teenager bleeding through his flesh. Looking over his shoulder, The Child of Hope eyed him. "Ichijouji...kun..."

END OF CHAPTER ONE

 

Author's Notes:
Okay, I may get flames for this coupling, but I don't care. XD Ok ok... Well originally I was going to write a Takari fic, but seeing how many people write that coupling and in my other series, Rebirth of Destiny, I had already planned out Takeru and Hikari to be hooked up. Now if only I'm already writing that series. I'm still writing the first series, Darkness and Light... So it may take a while.

Anyhoo, what a way to start this series. Takeru and Ken, two peeps with so many issues that nobody knows about and they act really damn depressed about it. That's life for you. Yeah, it's one of those ordinary life ficcies. Don't expect any Digimon to pop up. They will be perhaps mentioned or if they're lucky, they'll be slapped in the background. XD Oh and by the way, readers... Hikari is hooked up with Daisuke in this scenario, not to be mistaken to be Takeru. Takeru's single. :P The first names of Ken's parents were made up since their full names were never stated in the series. ^^; The drink Takeru chugs down in the locker room is Pokari Sweat, which is the Japanese equivalent to Gatorade or Powerade with less flavoring. @_@ It's not something you want to drink on a daily basis. XD The school Daisuke mentioned does not exist. If it did, I'll be scared. X_X I'm sure most of you know the Japanese references so I'm not going to mention them. If you don't know it, look it up.

Well see you next chapter, readers and please review. More reviews mean the more I am driven to write more!

 

Back   Forward